How Young is Too Young for Boarding School?

By Stefanie Hamilton

It's a question many parents find themselves asking again and again: "How young is too young?"

How young is too young for make-up? For dating? For a cell phone?

An increasing number of parents are also asking, "How young is too young for boarding school?"

The answer to that last question depends upon the family, the child, and the school in question.

Benefits of Boarding School

Many boarding schools offer challenging academic experiences, as well as opportunities for self-discovery and emotional growth. Boarding school students are often identified by university professors as being the best equipped for the demands of higher education. They're often among the most well-adjusted, self-confident members of the student body.

But when should a child's boarding school experience begin? Again, there isn't an age that applies across the board -- this decision needs to be based upon the needs of the student and the capabilities of the school.

A Stable Environment

Unfortunately, there isn't a lot of scientific evidence we can turn to for guidance -- but what we lack in hard data we can perhaps make up for in personal anecdotes. Boarding school stories abound from both students and parents.

One such story recently appeared in the British newspaper The Times. This article focused on four young girls who shared a boarding school dorm room.

  • All of the girls were 8 years old, and all of their parents struggled with the decision to enroll them.
  • The girls had another thing in common as well; all had fathers who were in the military.
  • Their parents had chosen boarding school for them because it offered the most stable environment.
  • If the girls stayed with their parents, they'd be moving every two to three years, and would have to adjust to new schools and new friends every time.

This type of reasoning makes sense, as stability at a young age is important.

What About Homesickness?

What could give parents pause (and did cause doubt among some parents in this story) is the potential for adverse reaction, most often in the form of homesickness while at boarding school. For example of the students in The Times story was so homesick that she got physically ill.

It's exactly those kinds of possible reactions that create doubt in parents as they consider boarding school. And it's difficult to accurately weigh them against boarding school's possible benefits. After all, while less than 2 percent of kids experience intense symptoms of homesickness, that low number doesn't comfort the parents of the 2 percent.

A child's ability to adjust to boarding school is largely dependent on his or her maturity, personality, and flexibility. Parents need to honestly and accurately assess these factors when considering boarding school.

A Range of Services

Sometimes, however, boarding school offers benefits necessary to a child's development, making issues like homesickness less of a factor.

Going back to story from The Times, the girl who struggled with homesickness had a learning disability, which was a determining factor for her parents. Because her family moved around so much, the girl rarely received the type of attention required for her to learn.

At boarding school her learning disability could be measured, and a long-term educational plan could be implemented -- something she would never receive in public school.

And, though it took a bit longer than it did with her friends, this girl did eventually adjust to boarding school. She made good friends, and even occasionally opted not to go home for the weekend.

Making the Decision

Sending any child to a boarding school or other type of residential facility is a decision that requires careful consideration and an assessment of the child's strengths and weaknesses. For younger children, this process may be particularly important.

Any reputable boarding school will be willing to answer all of your questions and help you determine if the school is the best fit for your family.